A woman who never thought that she would have children on account of being asexual found herself in a position where she felt stable enough to raise children all by herself.
With this in mind, she claims that she decided to go down the IVF route, using a sperm donor to get pregnant.
However, as she was keen to look into their medical history first, she did not want to choose an anonymous donor, The Mirror reports.
Therefore, the perfect solution appeared to her when an old friend that she had known since her high school days offered to be her donor, all the while happily accepting that he would play no parental role whatsoever in the child’s life.
The woman, aged 30, ended up getting pregnant with her friend’s donor sperm, and, at 33 weeks, is soon set to welcome twin girls into the world.
However, her friend had failed to mention one very important detail during their arrangement – he hadn’t told his wife.
Taking to Reddit, she explained that she’d generously taken her friend and his wife out for dinner as a thank you, but was surprised when the wife didn’t understand where her gratitude was coming from.
She wrote: “His wife was confused when I explained the reason for the dinner and then angry, demanding to know why we kept this from her.
“I was just as shocked and asked my friend if he hadn’t told his wife. He tried to explain to both of us that he hadn’t thought it’d matter as he has no rights to them at all.
“His wife got even angrier at that part stating she isn’t comfortable with their six-year-old sons having siblings that aren’t really his siblings and she wants that part changed so that her husband has a legal say over the girls. “
The poster, who goes by the username u/RadiantAppearance57, was left shocked by this demand, making it clear to the wife that she didn’t want her friend involved at all, and that she intended to raise her daughters alone.
She continued: “The three of us got into a huge argument and his wife demanded to know why I wouldn’t tell her that her husband had offered this in the first place.
“I feel very guilty for not checking with his wife first but it honestly never occurred to me that he wouldn’t have done that, so I thought if he was offering she had to have already given the okay.”
The poster went on to clarify that, had she known the wife had been left in the dark, she’d never have agreed to him being her donor in the first place.
One fellow Reddit user wrote: “It wasn’t your responsibility to check with the wife – it was his! This is his problem, not yours. Stand your ground with the agreement made with him – the wife sadly has no say in it. “
Another advised: “How could you know he didn’t tell her? Obviously, he never intended to. Since you aren’t a mind reader, you couldn’t have known.
“Get a lawyer because his wife is going to pressure him into getting some sort of custody. Your friend should have told his wife before he went through with this.”
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