Some deaths leave life lessons. There were many at the farewell of Almudena Grandes last Monday in the civil cemetery of Madrid. One of them – “There is no love without admiration” – was written on a beautiful portrait of the writer, but it could also be read in the gesture of her husband, Luis García Montero, when he kissed and placed a book of love poems on the coffin. , Completely friday. His way of loving himself, of admiring himself, will forever be an example of how to handle the most important matter at hand, the most momentous choice of all: without settling, being very, very ambitious. Knowing that choosing someone better than us will make us better.

Imagine the constant encouragement and peace of mind of poisoning yourself knowing that each time, when you get home, you will hit the antidote. Think how little mediocrity, vulgarity and filth must matter when you arrive at a home that smells like a refuge; how softly nonsense or insults should be heard when expecting great conversations; how comfortable it must be, also, the silence, the pause and the caresses between those who know each other best. Suppose you are at a dinner party with a lot of people and between the chatter and the conventions it is the person with whom you arrived and with whom you will leave the one who causes the biggest laughs or the one who utters the only phrase that will be remembered from that night. Conceive a discussion just to reconcile, to make sure, from time to time, who you want to be with and who you want to return to.

Imagine that one of the most beautiful songs by Joaquín Sabina speaks of you; that thousands of people know who they are and what they did; who can recite his verses, hug his books in a cemetery.

So that the end of the world catches you dancing, so that the honeymoon does not start, you have to be brave, even somewhat reckless. It is convenient to be very attentive if something appears, to let it grow; believe in grand gestures with the faith of the fans.

“I guess being down is a way to stay in love and start a new life with your old love,” he said. The loss is very recent, but García Montero already knows that the time they had will always matter much more than the time that was taken from them. That chance, the luck of meeting and the courage to dare will be worth more than the misfortune of having to say goodbye too soon, and that it will hurt less to lose it than the idea of ​​not having had it.

Loves where that is lacking are quickly consumed, admiration, and it is good that it should be so to return us as soon as possible to the correct lane and race. It is not certain that it will happen, the extraordinary has never been guaranteed, but it does exist. Almudena and Luis are the proof, for reds and blues, believers and atheists, that this kind of love, this way of life, was and is possible. Thank you for reminding us.

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