“I kicked a player out of our Dungeons and Dragons group because she couldn’t do maths”

The internet was pretty peeved at a board game fanatic who kicked out a player because of her maths ability

The woman was drove to tears after being kicked out of the game
The woman was drove to tears after being kicked out of the game

A man has taken to the popular Reddit thread ‘AITA’ (am I the a** hole) to ask the internet for some opinions after kicking a player out of a gaming session due to her maths skills.

The man had been playing fantasy board game Dungeons & Dragons for two years with the same six men.

A co-worker joined them for a few games, but the man decided to kick her out of the game which drove her to tears.

This was all down to her mathematical ability, which according to the man, wasn’t good enough for the game.

He explained: “So in D&D there is a lot of math. Not difficult math, but a lot of it.

“Basically in combat you roll dice, add or subtract based on your character’s stats, and use the final result to determine if you hit an enemy, how much damage you do, or if you escape a spell or trap.

“It really is mostly single digit addition with some double digit thrown in. Nothing too tricky. At least not for most people.”

Their co-worker, Sarah, had been playing with them for a few months now, and it took her a little longer to work out the maths.

He continued: “It takes her about 10 times as long to take a turn as it does anyone else at the table.

“I don’t mind someone being a bit slower on the mental math aspects of the game, but this woman actually has turns that go over seven or eight minutes because it takes her a full minute to add three single digit numbers together.”

At first, the group thought she was just learning the rules and may have been nervous, but it turned out it was the calculations.

The man said: “At this point she is taking so long that we are losing a lot of our limited game time just sitting around waiting on her to finish her turn.

“A rotation at the table is basically all of us taking one to two minute turns, the DM [dungeon master] taking three to four minutes, and then Sarah taking almost as long as all of us combined.

“It sucks. It isn’t fun only getting maybe 90 minutes of game done in a three to four hour session.”

After a quick group text, they discussed removing Sarah from the group, and everyone was onboard apart from one person.

After messaging in the group chat, the men decided to kick her out



He explained: “Everyone seems on board with the idea except for Adam who doesn’t want to things to be awkward at work should she be kicked from the group.

“He also argues that she is having a lot of fun which is true. Even when she is struggling to do her turns she does seem to genuinely have fun.”

They agreed to give her another chance, and she still ended up being slow and even more frustrated due to pressure from the others.

“Adam had mentioned that we needed the game to go faster, and so now the pressure was on her and it definitely showed.

“Now Sarah was more annoyed and short with us during the session and was clearly not having fun anymore.

“By the end of the session Sarah ends up snapping at me and another player and started to cry.”

They cut off the session and Sarah stormed outside in tears until her co-worker, Adam, took her home.

The man claimed he hadn’t heard from either Adam or Sarah much since, and now feels guilty because of his reaction.

He concluded: “So am I the a**hole here? We basically introduced someone to a game they really enjoyed, but because she couldn’t do math fast enough we ended up making her break down in tears and leave angry at us instead of having fun.

“I was the primary driving force initially to remove her from the game, and I was definitely the most frustrated by her. Now that it has happened though I just feel really guilty.”

The internet had pretty mixed opinions on the matter, with most of them believing the man was in the wrong for his reaction.

Other fellow D&D players were quick to stick up for the man though, who claimed to understand his frustrations.

Here’s a Reddit AITA key for reference:

You’re the a** hole (& the other party is not) = YTA

You’re Not the a** hole (& the other party is) = NTA

Everyone sucks here = ESH

No a** holes here = NAH

One user responded: “YTA. I don’t understand why you can’t let her roleplay and have Adam do the math for her?

“He could easily have all her stats and do the quick math after she made the rolls. D&D should be fun and inclusive and not a math-nerd-only game.”

Another user added: “YTA. You ruined what was a game by making it a job and drove her to a stress related meltdown. But you already know this…”

Interestingly, a Reddit user responded to this comment sticking up for the man, who said: “Do you play D&D?

“I do and there’s few things more frustrating than sitting behind one person who takes ten minutes to pick out a course of action on their turn, let alone someone who needs that long to add numbers together.

“NTA, just a guy trying to make sure the game is fun for everyone involved and is dealing with someone who’s too insecure to accept help for her problem.”

Do you think this man was in the wrong for his reaction?

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George Holan

George Holan is chief editor at Plainsmen Post and has articles published in many notable publications in the last decade.

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