It’s ‘crime week’ in the Westminster media grid, which means committing as much of it as possible, says Fleet Street Fox
Image: Daily Mirror/Andy Stenning)
Were a drug kingpin running the country, you would probably expect to see the police being called to rowdy parties in Number 10, a Parliament laced with cocaine, and a government legislating to put itself above the law.
Because we don’t have a criminal in charge, the police aren’t investigating the Number 10 parties, the Class A drugs, or the reason why one group of citizens thinks they should not be subject to court rulings.
I’m sure that democracy probably is better than being subject to the whims of an organised crime group, but at the moment it is difficult to see how, exactly.
And it seems that the government has also forgotten what the difference is supposed to be, as Justice Secretary Dominic Raab took to the airwaves to announce a crackdown on crime just 24 hours after declaring that police “don’t normally look back and investigate things that have taken place a year ago”.
Mr Raab, who has two law degrees, said that if the Mirror’s revelations last week about Downing Street parties during lockdown were true, they were a breach of coronavirus rules. He added that, because it happened a year ago, the police wouldn’t do anything about it.
Which is a bit awkward for a Justice Secretary today launching a reform of rape prosecutions, because thanks to Ministry of Justice cutbacks it can take up to 3 years to get a rape charge to court, and the police rarely change their minds on the basis it’s been a while.
Other crimes they investigated, despite it being more than 12 months since they were committed, include the Hillsborough tragedy, interbank Libor rate fixing, the Brinks Mat bullion robbery, and the 1993 murder of Stephen Lawrence, whose killers were put behind bars in 2012.
Police investigated Jimmy Savile after he was DEAD, for pity’s sake. And Slipper of the Yard didn’t give up on Ronnie Biggs just because it had been 38 years since the Great Train Robbery.
(
Image:
Getty)
Then there’s the Lockerbie disaster, still being investigated despite the conviction and later release of the main suspect, 33 years on; Fred West, whose serial murders led to a Gloucester cafe having its floor dug up just 7 months ago; and the murder of estate agent Suzy Lamplugh, which led to the excavation of a back garden in Sutton Coldfield in 2018 despite the fact she’d disappeared 32 years earlier.
Dennis Nilsen kept parts of his victims in his fridge and under the floorboards and flushed them down the toilet for 5 years before he was nicked. Susan and Christopher Edwards lived high on the hog of her parents’ money for 15 years after they’d shot and buried them. Russell Causley, who killed his wife Carole Packman in 1985, was jailed twice for the crime – once in 1996, and again in 2004.
And let’s not forget Colin Pitchfork, who killed two girls in 1983 and 1986, was only arrested 14 months later, and is considered such a “remorseless psychopath” that when he was released from, then returned to, prison 3 weeks ago a certain Justice Secretary of this parish said that the parole system needed to be changed, precisely because the passage of time had made no difference.
(
Image:
UK Government/Flickr)
The disappearances of Milly Dowler and Madeline McCann. Rochdale grooming gangs. The Moors Murderers. Frankie Howerd’s tax records, Basil from the Hatton Garden heist, and Dr Harold Shipman. The list of crimes investigated more than a year after their commission is endless, as Raab should well know from his repeated meetings with the family of Harry Dunn who was killed by a US spook driving on the wrong side of the road in 2019.
But these are all serious, high-profile crimes. The piddling business of a breach in the Covid rules aren’t the same, surely?
No. Because a breach of the Covid rules is an offence under the Public Health (Control of Disease) Act 1984, which says that any charge must be made within 3 years of the offence. And that’s why it is reported that 14 different prosecutions are underway in London for doing exactly that in December last year.
Which means boozy Downing Street parties won’t be in the clear until the end of 2023.
(
Image:
REUTERS)
While Mr Raab is merrily suggesting that most paedophiles, murderers, terrorists, and tax fraud should go uninvestigated, his colleagues have been getting away with breaking rules that would lead to criminal charges for the rest of us.
Anyone else caught on camera snogging an aide at work while under Tier 3 restrictions would expect a visit from the bobbies, but not Matt Hancock.
Members of the public who drove a short distance for a dog walk were met with police drones and on-the-spot-fines during lockdown, but not ex-No10 adviser Dominic Cummings, who drove a knowingly-infected family 400 miles to a place with fewer hospital beds to go round.
Any of us who tried to set up a charity to pay a £58,000 decorating bill, siphoned public money to friends whose overpriced goods were not fit for purpose, or tried to illegally close down Parliament, would find ourselves in the dock quicker than we could say: “Didn’t you go to Eton, officer?”
And of course, Michael Gove is still committing crimes against dance.
Most of us wouldn’t carry out a crime if there were police stood outside the front door, writing down the names and times of everybody coming and going.
On the day before the Downing Street party, the government announced Tier 3 restrictions for 38m people, schools were due to shut for an extra week after the holidays, and scientists warned of a fresh lockdown.
On the day after, Boris Johnson told the country: “I am sorry to report that the situation has deteriorated since I last spoke to you three days ago.” We thought he was speaking about the alpha variant, but perhaps with hindsight he meant a rush on the Downing Street stocks of Berocca.
Today, there are revelations that drug dogs may be introduced to Parliament – also filled with police – after cocaine was found in 11 of 12 locations tested, and that the government is pressing ahead with a law to stop itself being subject to judicial review, in order to end the embarrassment of judges deciding it has broken the law.
You’ll note the government has not decided to stop breaking the law, just change it so it no longer gets into trouble. Even Lord Lucan – should he ever return – would not expect to get away with that.
Which means that either Justice Secretary Dominic Raab is as dumb as a bag of spanners, or he thinks we are. Which is it?
www.mirror.co.uk
